There
are some things close to my heart which I'd like to share and even as it isn't a big deal when
compared to other more serious events happening around us, I find it
necessary to pen them down, to mark and remember this learning process
that is currently still ongoing..
So bear with me and hopefully this
will also be helpful for those of you who are going through something
similar in your lives :')
The
last two years were probably some of the most stressful years of my
life, both in my personal and work spheres.
I was at my lowest point in
2012, and genuinely felt the weight of this quote:
"When we hit rock bottom, God is the rock at the bottom."
I
am so incredibly thankful for angels in the form of my closest friends
and family, who stood by and walked with me every step of the way.
They
spent countless nights and weekends with me, providing me comfort and
companionship with their presence.
Everyday I felt like I was waking up
to a dark cloud hovering above me, and everything appeared bleak. It was
a difficult time. And it took a lot for me to muster all my strength and
trudge on, going in baby steps.
I am also extremely grateful to all my
readers and customers who took the time to drop me a message and note
of encouragement during those times :')
Last year was an
extremely challenging year for me at work. Scaling down from four to two
directors at Love, Bonito made it really tough to keep the company
surging forward -- there was a lot of taking over of roles, scrambling around and tying up
loose ends. Huge shoes to fill for sure.
Countless times I have doubted
my abilities to lead and grow the company, and I spent a great number of
nights crying out to God for help.
It
was manic to say the least.. Thank God I didn't have much time to dwell
in my unsettledness because time was precious and I tried to spend whatever free
time from work there was to read up as much as possible, seek counsel
from my pastor, and talk to successful and experienced business owners and leaders to
gain as much insights.
Having
to co-manage Love, Bonito with Viola taught me the big difference between being an
entrepreneur and being a great, solid leader. But thank God I learnt that leaders can
be made and trained, phew! I devote my nights to reading relevant books, and they have really helped me in building
confidence especially when I put into practice the invaluable things which I've learnt.
I am thankful that God has given me these
opportunities to grow and make mistakes, and learn from them.
In the
process, I've made so many self discoveries about new habits and
disciplines that I need to instil, and those that had to be changed.
For
example, I used to be highly disorganized (better now by the grace
of God!) and never really understood how frustrating it was to have to
work with someone so untidy.. *gulps*
And that's just one example!! I'm still ironing out
other bad habits in my life :)
Slowly but surely.. I know that I will
get better. I have to!
Everything
happens for a reason.
And I believe that there really is a reason for every
season in our lives.
Even as we may be forced to endure times that are
hard and bleak, when everything seems insurmountable, we have to keep
the positivity afloat.
Keep the faith... the breakthrough will come.
I know it's tough.. and it takes a whole lot of courage and discipline to focus on the positive, but that also helps us appreciate and be grateful for whatever we have in our lives.
There
have been so many times that I came close to throwing in the towel and
giving up.. because of how inadequate I felt, in so many ways.
But God continually assured me time and again.. I still remember one of the
nights when I was crying out to Him, and was reminded of this quote:
"God does not call the qualified.
He qualifies the called."
It left a deep impression on me, and till this day I hold on to it dearly.
I
honestly don't believe I have the characteristics of a natural leader, and there
are so many things for me to pick up and force myself to learn along
the way!
This is why the above quote resonates so strongly with me --
because I know that as long as I avail myself to Him (and I definitely have to), He will work His
power in me and through me.
And it begins with "going through the fire
to be tested, purified and cleansed" from all our imperfections.
It's an
extremely uncomfortable and difficult process, having to face your
flaws and weaknesses, and coming to terms with it in order to work on
them.
These
tough times have helped me to discover and see clearly my purpose in life, and made me
much, much stronger - mentally, emotionally and spiritually.
There is really
nothing like finding your passion, knowing your purpose and working
hard to achieve your dreams.
Looking back, I am truly grateful for all
the events (both good & bad) that have unraveled because without them, I
wouldn't have had the chance to learn, mature and grow.
Being in the situation and position that I was in, there really was only one way to go and one thing to do -
To trudge ahead without looking back.
"Don't waste the season of life you are in now because you want the next one to come.
Live in the moment;
Every season has its purpose."
Whatever giants in your life you are facing, keep the faith and trudge on.
It will get better.
And one day, you will look back and realize that everything had to happen in order for you to be stronger and live to your fullest potential.
Let's press on :)
